look at the ladder...reality check and two convincing wins

well round six is done and dusted and we are more than a quarter way through this season. any surprises folks? i bet most wouldn't have put sydney and hawks at the bottom. i for one suspected that the hawks wings had been finally clipped but i still think they are better than 17th. tigers smashing has come as no big surprise either, still credit to them for starting well, my prediction is that they will slide down the ladder and hover around the seventh to tenth rung. geez you would think i was some kind of footy expert, hee,hee. but have no fear there are no shortage of those if you linger around the forums...wise words to be found but also some way off the mark and some quite frankly ridiculous.
     well the carlton smashing really should have been more of a 150 point victory, too many behinds not converted to goals. that part of the game will need to be honed, improved accuracy will be essential in big games and close calls. having said that i am not going to complain. the team put on their big boy shorts and handed out a lesson. i wouldn't have expected any less. it sends a message to the competition that port mean business. to see them repeat it two weeks in a row to lowly teams is not only a sign of confidence but it is also banking those much needed early wins. at this stage there are very few teams who can afford to be complacent. i suspect there are always going to be some unexpected wins on the back of losses that really lull the tipster into a false sense of security...the collingwood/geelong clash and the swans/carlton game being perfect examples. the swans play the lions next week, surely they will get their first win on the board. however, the lions have shown some glimpses of good footy and are a club who are rebuilding. if the swans lose well then i expect a few of my footy mates will descend into deep footy depression. if they are prepared to save their sanity, they can jump on board some other team who looks like they are going to make it. OMG did i just say that? and would i take my own advice...nope, lol.
     so looking at the ladder now port's percentage is healthy and so continuing a winning streak will certainly do them many favours in frog jumping themselves into top four contention. time shall tell and of course if you subscribe to the one week at a time philosophy well then you won't get ahead of yourself...still doesn't insure one against footy pain. and for those of you currently suffering just cop it on the chin; footy can be cyclic, seasons of despair followed by an average run and before you know it you are back up the ladder chomping at the heels of a finals appearance. right now i would say that 1-5 are not quite set but 6-8 will fluctuate in the coming weeks. so that's it folks my footy analysis for the week.
     on another note, the lady army is beginning to recruit some admirers who are impressed with our vocal abilities and creative insults. there could be some openings available, so why not commence your training...trials will be announced soon and a checklist posted to see if you fit the bill but more importantly fit in with us, hee,hee. have not checked on my latest tipping score but got 6/9, two understandable but the dockers were shockers for me and i will be wary of tipping them again. won't mention that other team, coz it is sickening, lol, but as they say premierships aren't won in round 6 but it sure helps if you are on a winning streak. until round 7 keep your guernseys on and let us turn out in full force to clip those eagles wings.
love FFand F plus F plus the others XXX

showdown pain and a giants last quarter...double or nothing

     was well and truly lined up and waiting with niece number one who is a fully fledged member of the lady army plus others. (three hours before folks) the plus other was banned from our bay and was lurking somewhere in the background. no doubt he would have felt somewhat nervous after the first quarter but we didn't find him gloating come the final siren. smart move on his part coz it could have got ugly for him and seriously he would have been in a lot of  pain, hee,hee. such is the footy mixed marriage. and why do we tolerate it you must be wondering viewers? well there are only an esteemed few who get the lady army golden pass and benno just happens to be one of them. personally i think he looks better in teal, far more flattering for his complexion but each to their own. as much as it would be tempting to become a footy dictator, i shall settle for commandress for the time being!!!
     well i have to admit i was feeling rather confident, home showdown, first quarter we were out of the blocks, fast, ferocious run and carry. i think we took the crows by surprise but alas they responded in the second and the third while we seemed to go missing. that hurt us and after it was trying to play catch up. at one stage it looked as though the crows would storm into the fourth with a sizeable lead but the team fought back and rattled the fans enough to shut them up. going to the showdown folks is a lesson in self control. the temptation to suffocate a fan in front of me by pulling his beanie down until he could no longer breathe equated to my willpower to resist dark chocolate, a feat in itself but on rare occasion it can be done. and i have to say it was that fan's lucky night, hee,hee. 
     still too early to say in my books folks but with a 3-0 record going the way of our rivals and the next few games winnable for them i hate to say it...( i feel some reflux coming on) but they are off to a good start. as for us, the giants were always going to be a difficult one to snatch victory from. no ryder due to suspension and some academy award winning acting; (still trying to figure out how cameron got off  as well as that ridiculous decision to not pay wingard a free in front of goal) and no hombsch to lead our defence, (no offence boys you are doing an admirable job but it is so much better when hombschy is there with you) we didn't manage four quarters and fell flat in the last with a giant one from GWS putting a dent in our percentage. more than ever we will need to come out and smash the blues and teach them a lesson. time to put your big boy shorts on guys and repeat the demolition you dished out to freo who incidentally have recovered  themselves after that flogging.
     it is going to be a tough season folks. premiership isn't won in the first few weeks but it certainly goes a long way if you are 4-0 or at least 3-1, early wins pay dividends come the tail end of the season. and as i have mentioned many a time, finals are what will count and this season is certainly going to provide some  interesting contests which will inevitably shape the final eight. calling it just for now i predict crows, cats, gws will be the top runners...bulldogs in there if they continue with last seasons work ethic and put past premiership glory aside. tigers...still not convinced yet and our guys i expect to re-enter the eight, there is no other alternative. the hunger appears to have returned, some fine tuning needs to be made and a rhythm established. no brainer that we are a better team with ryder in the ruck, so far he has been more than awesome. a much better tipping week from moi with 8/9. here's to starting off round five with my first prediction...POWER by 59.
Until round 5, keep your beanies on and get your brownlow bets in before the odss are no longer in your favour!
love FFFandF XXX 

home game heaven for moi but hell for son number two...plus a few others, hee, hee

warming up:photo credit: heleni first home game what can i say viewers? nothing short of heavenly. ruthless, determined, tenacious, fierce are just a few words that shell shocked the hapless dockers. i have to confess folks i was harbouring two freo fugitives in my household. however, before the first bounce they both predicted a smashing. me, myself and i remained tight lipped not wanting to invoke the wrath of the footy gods. but yes, i admit, i was confident of victory... somewhere in the vicinity of 30-40 points. but wow, just wow, no, make that triple wow, happy to be proven wrong and indeed a shellacking and percentage boosting win. if one doesn't get too far ahead of themselves... two impressive performances back to back are surely slightly worthy of the comp being put on notice? OK maybe until the next contest.       am i jumping the gun? this team has returned from two years of expectation and disappointment to announce itself as a far more determined and serious outfit. yes i know it's only two games. yes it was the shockers and yes it is a long season but please just allow me a little indulgence, hopefully it will not be short lived. from the first goal it was game on. port blitzed through the first quarter and the score was already indicative of a belting. robbie gray aka the wizard returned to his magical best to slot six goals by sirens end, assist and get his hands on the ball to weave his way around opponents and wreak havoc. big charlie dixon has certainly undergone some kind of transformation (i can't help saying that again) because he now seems to possess x-men hands. ( i am guessing there are some kind of sticky tentacles activated...hee,hee) i think port are possibly evolving into a match up nightmare. the young guns, houston and double P look far more seasoned for their experience. paddy awesome ryder must have undergone some rejuvenation at the cellular level, coz having a year off has certainly refreshed him and increased his appetite for the ball. the midfield lead by ollie and the addition of double P has finally been ignited. all in all it was a heavenly spectacle to behold, even though we, the lady army, were not functioning at   full strength...thanks to little sestra who had sold her soul to the supernormal twice cooked crispy duck! hopefully that will quickly be rectified.( infringement notices are already in the post to those of you who were absent...you know who you are!).        the season has now taken off and we are back to early arrivals to protect our territory in our beloved bay. this is the sacrifice we make, sure we could upgrade, but personally i have come to love being at ground level and close to the fence and the action so i can make myself known but not to security of course! lol. i have to confess viewers, when i found out razor ray would be officiating i was not jumping for joy. admittedly, once my most disliked man in fluorescent green he has made his way down the ranks for two others, but of course i will not mention any names, apart from my inventive nicknames...the perminator being one such creature, hee,hee. yes razor ray is certainly height challenged there is no doubt about that. my best insult is to tell him to put his high heels on so he can get a better view, add to that rubbish, bullshit and a few other choice words but truly the F and C bomb are not part of my footy vocabulary in public.i rely on my inherent genetic potential which is a voice loud enough to shatter glass but also perfect for footy barracking. i was born for it, hee,hee, now if only i had been born thirty years later so i could take to the field myself.drats!!!       as time ticked on, the game just got better folks, well better for us. (sorry freo fans) there was a momentary lapse when freo managed three goals in a row but that soon dissipated. by the time the final siren sounded port had destroyed the dockers by a hefty 89 points. condolences to my freo buddies who will get some sympathy from moi seeing that i lived there for many years and adopted the dockers just a little bit, ok make that just a teeny tiny bit, ok make that when it suits me like the grand final appearance! shame, shame, shame! i left my two freo fugitives to make their way home in the company of some sympathetic power fans and i along with heleni headed back to the magarey room for an account of the match. the atmosphere was robust, buoyant with victory and confidence. tommy jonas addressed the crowd answering questions from barry (time to take the curtains down), followed by the first appearance of double P, destined to become a crowd favourite and cult figure. personally i think he is a trunkified version of erol flyn, hee, hee. however, he seemed modest enough which is a good sign, coz we don't want our team flavoured with any figjam. also happy to hear from ken who seemed to have undergone a miraculous recovery, walking onto the stage with ease smiling like the cat who has got the cream.      so round two is officially done and dusted folks. i did regain some tipping respectability after a crap start, with eight from nine.hopefully i will build from there to end on a season high victory, well one has to be optimistic, considering i was runner up last year, i certainly could be in with a chance. so until round three i hope you are enjoying the start to the season (unless of course you are a suns fan, then you may have a lot to worry about). big game looming, it's gonna be hugely, it's gonna be terrific and even better if it results in a POWER victory. bring it on i say. we are the underdogs and i think that is just the way we at port like it. love FFFandF XXX

exactly...

have we transformed from ugly footy ducklings to a sight to behold? lol

is that joffa's brother?

well fans, have you recovered from the first round? how did your tipping go? me,myself and i crashed and burned round one but i consider that just a minor hiccup. but i am sure my fellow tipsters are jumping with glee at my rotten start. tigers won...big deal, they were playing boys and if they do what they usually do well then they will begin with a bang and peter out against tougher competition. maybe yes, maybe no. all i can say are the saints let me down big time, predicted they would be the big improvers but as early days go, perhaps i am already wrong. tipped the bombers though, went with gut instinct, hawks have lost some run and replaced a few with some duds? am not expecting hawks to rise above four this year...i say they are semi- rebuilding and essendon won't be the easy beats.
     well viewers i had my entire crystal collection out, i sent a few fireworks into the atmosphere in the hope the smoke would hover over the scg and inflict the swannies with some mild smoke inhalation or the very least affect their eyesight. i have to confess i tipped against power but i did say to lovie i had a gut feeling they would win. seriously this can be verified by lovie herself, next time i will listen to my inner footy voice. it was the game i was meant to be at but forces beyond my control kept me sitting on the couch. i have vowed this season to watch every second come win or lose and take it game by game, week by week. i will keep it as simple as that as insurance from falling into the getting ahead of ourselves trap. all i will add is momentum is the ace and apart from time to recover much needed stock, having a break during the finals could now become over rated...doggies, 2016...i rest my case! yes they beat the pies, round one but i wouldn't say it was entirely convincing. the pies were not disgraced but they certainly need to tighten up their defense...no make that strengthen it. two games in and me,myself and i were getting prepared to watch from the couch. i stayed there for the first half and kept a keen eye on the state of play with notepad handy. gotta say folks some untidiness but what i liked was the intensity and willingness to work hard. work rate has resurfaced from the depths of the past. some new blood, a bone crunching midfield and a reinvigorated ruckman spurred the side on. defensively we were very good.
     the first quarter revealed some dynamic passages of play but that came with an inability to finish them off. sam reid was looking like he was about to cause us some serious damage. big bad charlie actually marked the ball which made me wonder whether he had undergone some skin grafts during the off season as sigh...yes so many times i was tempted to throw a tube of tarzan grip his way in 2016. good to see him finally get some frees for a change but the same applied to the other end, so perhaps it will be a forward bounty in 2017. the highlight would have to have been PP's first goal as a debutant. man i thought ollie had thighs of steel but this kid has tree trunks which makes me reminisce of stewie dew. he certainly has a strong kick and a powerful presence.
      kicking efficiency is still an area for improvement, some untidy errors just when things seem to be in our favour. perhaps it was first game nerves but watching as the score remained relatively tight with no sign of a blow out was deemed very acceptable at this stage. personally i thought robbie and wolfman were quiet but while they seemed almost invisible, others stepped up to maintain the rage. at times we still missed crucial targets but i say early days and plenty of time for improvement. great to see young kicking goals and continuing his fine form, having a firm place in the team has done him and us a world of good. a goal by wingard after the siren gave us a one point advantage at half time and me,myself and i made an exit to join members of the lady army in welland headquarters.
     big shout out to lady army members libby and heleni who were at the game and keeping me informed by telephone link. i  did request they jump the fence and pass their phone to the playing group so i could give them some half time inspiration but alas the lady army coffers are low on funds at the moment. opening goal to our captain in the third term but a quick reply from buddy and some poor kicking and the onset of drizzle began to turn the game into a slippery spectacle. crap decision regarding robbies handpass but goals from darcy, amon, PP and youngy the goal sneak gave us a respectable lead and an enthusiasm in the kitchen that sent rocket dog into a barking frenzy...well he should know it is footy season again. all i can say is at this stage lovie was beside herself in disbelief...i can't believe it can we win she repeats to herself. by the start of the fourth quarter we have managed a 22 point lead , very handy in the new conditions. buddy scores the first goal but port has the answers thanks to polec and it continues with impressive goals from hartlett and a strong mark from little elvis (chad) seals the deal and ends in a jubilant victory for boaky's 200th. wow not a lot of us expected that but round one folks, wait until we get to round six to get an idea of where the teams lie. hope you enjoyed a fabulous first round and that your team has secured a confident boosting win, unless of course you are the enemy, hee,hee.
   so keep your gucha's on until round two. at least i will be able to watch my team in the flesh. unfortunately they will be playing against son number two's team. we are pencilled in for a win but i personally no longer subscribe to certainty. have we transformed from the ugly footy ducklings to a sight to behold? well maybe for one game, now we have to spread those wings and remember how to soar and fly if we are going to bring home the points on a consistent basis. competition will be tight this year viewers, no team can afford to be complacent or rely on supposedly pedigree youthful stocks. effort is king, desire is queen and when you put them together you have a solid footy marriage, add some excitement to the mix and it makes for sexy. woo hoo footy is back, and me, myself and i are just loving it once again!!!
love FFFandF XXX
PS. PP NAB rising star as predicted and of course well deserved.

lady army members at the scg...

da da da dah....the season has finally arrived!!!

well, well, well, if the footy season hasn't finally arrived. were you glued to your seats last nights viewers even though it was the tigers? were you just that little bit curious? and so tell me what was your verdict?
     me, myself and i have been lying dormant. last season just took it outta me folks. i had to switch off, lie low and bury that waste of a season into my memory banks. the truth is i have hardly paid attention to preseason...omg, shock, horror, how can that be so you must be thinking? well i just simply decided i was not going to pre-empt season 2017. i have come in virtually blind...well Ok i did watch an internal trial and a few mins of the JLT series and yes i confess i watched the last half against the hawks and was at least relieved the boys got a win under their belt. and yes i read the facebook commentaries from the doom and gloomers already writing the season off before it has begun. fortunately i still believe they are outnumbered by the optimists. 
     and now we are at the doorstep of round one. last night we opened the door and got a taste of things to come and i have to say i wasn't the least bit surprised. the usual happened, commentators getting over excited, dusty martin already pencilled in for 3 brownlow votes and by the sounds of it the medal is already his. admittedly he deserved them, i have no doubt about that. he is looking leaner, fitter and of course the tigers do what they usually do. throw out the footy carrot, the commentators fall for it and sing their illustrious praises. for footy's sakes it is the first game and no disrespect but they were playing carlton who got a fair flogging during pre-season.  if you are overly excited about that, i suggest you think again.has the football world learned nothing? it ceases to amaze me how already the trap of getting ahead of oneself is alive and well. nothing has changed in that book and i for one shall watch the season unfold and take it game by game to preserve my football sanity. i dare not think otherwise, hee,hee.
     so are you in a footy tipping comp? i am. last year i was runner up and scored a wad of cash but a few ill thought out tips stopped me from claiming glory. this year i aim to win and have my eye on the prize. so far i have one from one, tigers by 47 so pretty close folks. the rest of my round looks like this...doggies, saints ( tipping them to be the big improvers) swans...i know but am hoping for an upset and the power of my crystals reaching the SCG to alter the gravitational pull of the earth or something to that effect, lol, bombers to upset hawks and give fans something to be happy about, gold coast, roos at home, GWS to come out firing and send a message to the comp that all those draft concessions are about to pay off and freo to sneak in a win at home and take a life off the pussycats.that's it for round one but let's hope i am wrong about the swans.
     so good luck fans to all of you except for those who don't barrack for the power, hee,hee. seriously i hope they have been listening to those flogs (won't mention any names) who haven't even put them in the eight. i shall reserve my opinion  until round 6 which will give us an indication. i think the seasons are getting closer and percentage will make the difference. every win will count but by how much may determine in the end whether one team falls short. personally i no longer subscribe to the rest during finals unless of course there are injuries that could make a difference. as far as i am concerned you want momentum folks along with self belief, desire, determination and a bit of luck. the doggies had it all and took the flag, lets see if the puppies have really matured.
      and to finish off viewers i would like to remember the past supporters who are no longer with us, bless them and if divine intervention is available, could  they kindly send it our way. hip hip hooray footy is here... enjoy and may the best team win as long as it is mine, lol.
love
FFFandF XXX

missing in action...yep that was moi and what has happened since???

once upon a preliminary time...

a thousand apologies viewers really it should be more like a million...mm, yes i have been missing in action but i have a legitimate excuse or do i? hee,hee.

     like the team i was besieged with injury, serious injury that kept me outta my blogging world for quite some time. after deleting 25, 552 emails from my inbox and that believe it or not is pretty close to the truth (OK make it 25,525)...my hand was so numb i was unable to put my fingers to the keyboard. or really had i just given up? i don't blame you if that thought crossed your mind. jeez there were times that i came close but luckily for me the footy gods saw fit to ensure the sydney game was played while i was at a conference and spared me another FFFS ( for friggin footy sakes moment). what a season, what a roller-coaster and simply what a waste. whatever is happening behind closed doors they had better sort it out. we the fans are not that blind, body language and a few other things say it all. and to be honest it feels like i have hardly been to the football at all. the promise, the enthusiasm of the coming of port has pretty much evaporated. i shall reserve my verdict until next season when the team is fit, unencumbered by injury and has a few new faces desperate to make their mark on the AFL landscape.

     right now i should be enjoying our foray into the finals but alas like many others i must now watch from the sidelines...boo hoo. my only compensation and hope being that certain teams just choke and tumble out before they can get a foothold into september, lol. yes that perhaps might bring a smile but will never be as satisfying as being part of the finals action yourself. i still remember the 2014 prelim like it was yesterday and perhaps that is one of the flaws. we remember too much of yesterday instead of concentrating on today. well sadly there is no today for us and now i must wait with baited breath to see what happens when the dust has finally settled. talk of trades, VC on the table, i must admit i found that somewhat strange. you sign someone up for 5 years then happily dangle him like a carrot hoping that some club may take the bait and give you a good return.

      but what would i know? i am just an armchair analyst. however, what i do know is that change is necessary to facilitate new growth. the de-listings come as no surprise, as much as i love the butch he had ample time to develop into a required player. sarge was a sentimental favourite and i still would have liked to see him given another year fully fit to work in the forward line. mitchell gives his best but just wasn't able to cement a place in the first 22. colquhoun was a talent before his knee but he is still young enough that he may get picked up by another club. i wish them all well and i wait with interest to see what the next move is.

      in the mean time i shall watch and observe the finals, four down and another two to play out this weekend. the doggies did not surprise me with their win. it would appear that they were back to their best...ferocious really. west coast were abysmal, yes i know a bit rich from a port supporter but you can't sugarcoat the truth. kangaroos weren't much better. they should have just not bothered turning up. the crows were far too strong and in front of a home crowd... really were you expecting any less? GWS were impressive and are only at the beginning of their long term assault (OMG how terrifying). they made sydney appear almost useless. the traditional rivalry bewteeen cats and hawks was a cracker. cats pinched that one. and now the hawks will have to be in full flight and the absolute predator if they are to kill the doggies enthusiasm and self belief. and that is going to be one difficult task folks. as far as the swans go the pressure is all upon them so they had better take full advantage of the SCG.

     and as for moi i shall put my scarf away until the next season arrives but will lend my support to the doggies for the flag. if they can hunt in packs, apply the same relentless pressure and use that run to wear the hawks down then they are in with more than a chance. hawthorn will need to control the game and the tempo, otherwise they may find their wings will get clipped very quickly. let us hope that whoever makes the GF ( as long as it is not you know who, hee,hee) that it is an exciting sitting on the edge of your seat one for a change. hip hip hooray for that!!! 

enjoy the finals campaign viewers, that's it from moi this week,

love FFFand F XXX

PS welcome back paddy and gus!!!
PPS i came second in the footy tipping comp...DRATS!!!

first bite but no blood...power run out lion tamers

image: afl.com

come on be honest viewers how many of you were just wondering if port were going to show us a repeat of last year? yes fess up! well according to the tipping competition i am in where you go for the guernsey it appeared that many of you were not overly confident. port by 14, port by 10, port by 23, port by 7...WHAT??? i went port by 83... 8 plus 3 equals eleven which is my lucky number, well that was my logic. however, i was fairly optimistic there would be a flogging. well i was until i watched the first few minutes. by that time i am sure a few of you were beginning to freak out, allowing the ghosts of the 2015 defeat haunt you. WOOOOOO...WOOOOOO...BOOOOOO!!! i have to confess with a party gaining momentum i had one eye on the TV and one on the shenanigans unfolding... (fuelled with the help of a little alcohol, hee,hee)

    also viewers i had to contend with one annoying crows supporter who fortunately was shut up by the half time siren. 47 points and counting. go the BUTCH!!! the lions may have taken the first bite but they didn't draw blood. if the lions were banking on the confidence of a win the previous week, port negated that by depositing far more goals into their own account along with the misses...OUCH. the glory days have almost been forgotton, the lions sadly for their supporters no longer the ferocious beast of football. and yes we certainly know how that feels, don't we? 

     but that was some time ago folks and even though our season has been interrupted by forces not within our control our makeshift side has been resonable. as the power ignited and flicked the switch our celebrations synced which was just as well as we were celebrating a milestone for big ivan the irishman who has embraced the POWER as his own. percentage boosting win but not many will take notice. the finals thread hasn't quite snapped until x of the football equation is solved. will it be round 20?