who has the blues???

well viewers come on spit it out, get it off your chest, admit it if you dare, if you have to...is the season over in your eyes? are you now in the midst of the footy blues? some of you definitely are. for goodness sakes i even had a member come to my house for therapy ( luckily i was still in melbourne town). looks like i am gonna have to moonlight as a footy therapist if this season slide continues...so i implore you POWER TO STOP THIS IMMEDIATELY! i have enough to occupy myself without having to add footy counsellor to my list of things to do, hee, hee. 

     boy oh boy. it started off so well. airport collection via luxury vehicle with heated seats, yes can you believe it, heated seats? back in fine company and also back to melbourne lady army headquarters which are ever so comfortable. so much fun, so much banter, so much cheese and soooo much wine, hee,hee. little did i know what lay ahead for us the lady army representatives the following day...(%&%&) personally i was not thinking it was going to be a walk in the park. and personally i was thinking what better time to start a shift in momentum. confidence was in the air, not a care in the world did i the lady commandress entertain, ( after all it is not every weekend i get to escape my children and to indulge in footy, food and fun) but alas no...make that a big no, make that a huge no, make that a painful no... just our luck to face the blues who decided to come out and play. thanks carlton you could have saved that for someone else!

     yes folks as disappointing as it may seem the reality is despite the lopsided umpiring and some of those outrageous decisions the guys were outmuscled and out played, simple as that. yes carlton may have been bottom but they certainly didn't play like it. and what better incentive to know you are in the game and have a fighting chance. the last time we were at the G we were lamenting a 3 point loss and the dream of playing in the 2014 grandfinal. but according to many, the boys were spooked, their confidence shot and yes would have to agree because turnovers cost us the game in the end and losing robbie gray didn't help our cause either. but perhaps blue betty may also be partly to blame. OMFF ( oh my friggin footyballs) what was that monstrous contraption? and whose ridiculous idea was that? BIG LOL...seriously the most disappointing thing for me was not witnessing it with my own eyes!!! i was too busy acquiring the red wine for the lady army...i should have got a barrel while i was at it, hee, hee. if i had known where blue betty was garaged and captain carlton was hiding i would have personally got a pair of bolt cutters and made CC drive it onto the field in the last quarter so i could have picked up hoff and given him a direct route to the goals. alternatively i could have run down the umpires and blamed in on CC himself...24 frees to 10, that number says it all but at the end of the day the guys have to suck it up, put that one aside and regroup for the next match.

     (post match)

the one shining light viewers was meeting up with lady army reinforcements, muchos gracias gabi and cynthia our argentinian wing of LA. another was confronting el presidente himself as the lift doors opened. "OMG it is the port adelaide footy hierachy! i exclaimed. Kochie do you need a hug?" and yes members my footy counselling ways kicked in again and i had to console the president himself much to the amusement of my fellow LA members. and yes we waited and watched as a dejected group walked in feeling the pain and significance of the loss...opportunity evaporated, a gallant comeback that just fell short of the line. a comeback that had the most annoying carlton fan silenced. don't you just hate it? so, so hard when you have to suck that one up viewers. ( i did however have the opportunity to strangle a carlton supporter myself but he took that in jest as it was intended to be, lol)

     so to keith thomas... we know they are a young side, well at least i do. you do not need to explain yourself to me. perhaps the weight of expectation and the pressure has taken somewhat of a toll but when the going gets tough the tough have to get going regardless of the simple fact that this isn't the same team of 2014 because it actually isn't. we have yet to field our strongest team and if finals do not happen to come to fruition then so be it. come back better, bigger and stronger. indeed add stronger to that coz we seem to be a little lightweight in that area. lovie is very concerned about this but we did encourage her to volunteer in the kitchen.  but  excuse me, where were you guys when robbie was slung to the ground? where was the comeback? you should have sent gibbs a strong message. hardwick, byron and josh carr wouldn't have let that slide, so next time bloody well stick up for your team mate or i will charter my own helicopter and chase you around the oval and flour bomb you myself!! srum te bilo guys ( hrvatski translation...shame on you)!

     so now i come to my next point. i think as a paying member i should be entitled to claim compensation. after that loss i entered into what is commonly known as carbicide. i have lost count of the number of cuppa soups i have consumed and vita wheats with vegemite i have inhaled at school. i have lost count of the lollies i have stolen from a fellow colleagues lolly jar that happens to sit conveniently on her desk. ( fortunately for me she has been blaming it on the kids, hee, hee and until she installs video surveillance i do not think i can be stopped!) in fact i haven't been able to stop my slide into carbicide since my return. the rate i am going i may as well claim some complimentary training sessions with burgo too. 

     we ate our way around melbourne folks and what a tasty journey that turned out to be. first stop the amazingly delicious and consistent supernormal. great ambience, great service, friendly, attentive but also restrained. the best duck ever. in fact every morsel is soooo delicious that i cannot help myself but return to this wonderful eatery every time i visit melbourne. tapas style with an asian focus...dumplings were delsih, kimchee excellent, can't go past the sauteed mushrooms and rice cakes. also tried the brocoli salad with egg and bonito flakes, yum! if this eatery was situated in adelaide it would definitely be my regular food haunt. the coffee is always great because in this town competitton ensures that it is. you are pretty much guaranteed a good coffee wherever you happen to be.

      next dinner date was at the highly anticipated lucy liu. just the three of us, me, little sista and niece we were definitely the inconspicuous food critics. groovy interior, very good service but if i am to be honest there was absolutely no wow factor in the food. the steamed greens and prawn dumplings were delicious but everything else pretty much rated as average. the short rib rendang had me eagerly awaiting a dish that would be flavoursome but it really came out as an ok. the thai fishcakes were terrible, deep fried and resembling nothing of the authenticity i have experienced in thailand myself. however, the organic tempura tofu and vegetables passed the taste test. overall i would say as much as the service was friendly and hospitable it was overpriced and not a place i would be running back to or recommending when there is so much else on offer. however i would recommend the top paddock in richmond. by the buzz and business of this place you can see why it is so popular. definitely a booking is required during the week but fortunately for us we did not have to wait long for a table for six. a delicious brunch style menu, i enjoyed a steak between some freshly toasted turkish bread and a very good cup of coffee. i sampled little sista's trout which was cooked perfectly so i forgave the fact that it didn't hold true to the flavours stated on the menu. to add to that was wonderful friends, a big ladies catch up listening to latest news and throwing is some good laughs too.

     i have to admit viewers by the time i was ready to leave melbourne town and had done my post match analysis i seemed to have developed a second wind. knowing full well it would be my responsibility to revive the confidence of the lady army plus others; i came away surprisingly re-energised and creatively awoken. awoken to the possibilities that awaited our fine lady army members, hee,hee. little do they know what is in store for them. and little do port know what is in store for them but one must act when the time is ripe and that time is now!!! please stay tuned for a new and improved  look for our lady army members coming to a home match close to you....ba ha ha ha ah ah aha.

until the next home game, if the blues have hold of you add some colour to your life, it just could be the therapy you need. do not lose faith followers. plant a seed of hope not a seed of doubt.

love FFandF XXX

PS a million thankyous to the wonderful hospitality of the ellis clan, we love youse all!!!

PPS before i forget we also made a lovely train trip to bacchus marsh to visit the infamous pascoe who incidentally was meant to join us at the g with her teal poncho. unfortunately she was unwell but fortunately for us we had a wonderful afternoon meeting her gorgeous grandaughter alice. happy first birthday little angel xxx

where to find supernormal... aka superfabulous

how many lives do we have left???

OMG are we running out of lives viewers? is this the end? is it all downhill from here? personally i still have faith which is better than hope. the reason i say that is because my block of old gold dark chocolate still remains intact! (70% cocoa might i add) and yes every bit of it remained intact, not one square was consumed during the course of the match.  i didn't even reach down to inhale it to revive myself! lol. however, i will admit to 3 glasses of red perhaps hoping that the game looked better than what it really was...drats!!!

     the first quarter was highly competitive. strong, contested footy but on the park we looked small compared to the tall, solid cats. have we got too lean for the sake of the run folks? mm, just a thought. and if so, is it time to recruit some of the mamas or papas for that matter ( who have some culinary nous) to pack some meat on their bones? even at half time we were within touch. i for one was actually feeling relaxed and confident that the game was ours for the taking considering what was up for grabs. 

before the match i even received a text from a buddy who is a cats fan almost conceding defeat before the game had started. and of course from another one post match who dared to rub it in, tagging me on my FB timeline. how very dare he? and make that double very dare he taking advantage of my weakened position, ( triple drats) hee,hee.

      what can i say fellow fans? well firstly CLANGER comes to mind, 9 out on the full...BIG OUCH! and a few suspect umpiring decisions which doesn't help but inevitably does not lose you the game. i am still not prepared to concede our season has come to an end but if we go back to back losses with another defeat at the MCG then even i... devoted, enthuisiastic, optimistic power fan may begin to let the doubts creep in. i do have another theory though. the lady army were somewhat depleted thanks to one of our esteemed members relinquishing her boundary spot to hob nob it in a corporate box. ( apart from free booze , i did hear the food was not up to our standards...sucked in!) she has a voice that could shatter a thousand eardrums and was sorely missed. two rows from the boundary and another wine and i could have leaped the fence and tackled stevie j myself. but of course pledging to demonstrate exemplary fan behaviour i resisted the temptation. i am not sure i could do the same next week if we lose the plot....because i shall be travelling to melbourne for footy, food, fun and catching up with my interstate friends. ( some of which will be fake lady army members for the afternoon). come on guys fire up and get your act together. we are bringing the noise and i kindly request that you bring your A game. according to my mathematical predictions if we can win by about 350 points then we will get a huge percentage boost. (that may just be enough to propel us into the eight)...OMG look what i have resorted to...i am becoming footy delusional.

      so what do you think viewers? do we still have any lives left? or have you already conceded? all i can say that some of the lady army are very close, let's not make it dangerously close team, coz then the reality will be the power express has run out of steam...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

until the MCG, 

love FFFandF XXX

PS wingard... best on ground by far but he can't win the game on his own

doggies sent back to their kennel...time to short circuit the cats nine lives!!!

port fans...were you feeling slightly nervous? were you 100 percent convinced the power would muzzle the doggies bite and silence their bark? mm, honestly? i thought it would be a free flowing game, fast paced, tightly contested. i thought the doggies would be let off the leash and allowed to hunt in packs...well they certainly hunted down our captain inspiration but from my viewpoint it looked more like a wrestle. it wasn't until the last quarter when the power switch was flicked, the power surge came to fruition and yes folks that was rather awesome to see. the fans confidence is back returning with the shift in form...time to get into the next gear power!

     well what can i say folks? no time for pacing last saturday night, ( so to lose a few kilojoules just wear a few less layers and let the cold get to work on your fat cells instead!) the lady army was almost at full force with a few missing but some eager ring ins to take their place. nothing is more enjoyable than a convincing win. nothing more enjoyable than taking your thermos of home made chocolate or spiced coffee, hee, hee to enjoy with some pastries! and indeed there were some eyeing off our gourmet delights but what do you expect from the lady army? we are an assortment of culinary queens ( just to let you know this week it will be slow roasted lamb shoulder rolls)...oops correction, (have just been advised by lovie they will need to be kept warm and somehow I don't think they will let her in with her pie warmer, hee,hee).
     so i have just recovered from last weeks victory. i was in a victory cloud and it was difficult to see, lol. the lady army made their way into the game day village post match for a drink and a bit of a boogie and by the time the last train took us home, i for one knew i was heading for a sleep in....but drats, no rest for the wicked coz someone had to be on taxi duty for rowing. however, well done lady army and bonus points for our lord howe resident, such dedication, such passion even if she disappears every now and then to calm her nerves. we might have to start flying her back for every home game because guess what? everytime she has been there we have won.
      so now we are sitting at five/five. the guys have been crucified by the media for the three losses in a row but there are still some who have not jumped off the power express just yet...choo, choo. i said the slump came early. i still say there is method in burgo's madness. and i say we need to win the next two before the bye to make a full-on assault upon the second half of the season. i feel a power surge coming on and no better way to inflict some damage than to show it on the scoreboard tonight. it is a big game viewers but a home one at that. we need to have everyone firing tonight and to keep up the goal kicking. i prefer the look of the forward structure, schulz taking away the defenders leaves gray and wingard to weave some magic. stewart is a solid player that can kick a few goals and i must admit i was sitting on the fence in regard to sammy gray but he had a great game last week. thought clurey took some great marks and wolfman was back in full force. just gotta love the wolfman, so versatile, can take some great marks and save us in defence when it counts. and what about ollie? ollie,ollie,ollie, oi,oi,oi...future captain and brownlow medalist in the making. what a difference he has made to the midfield. we have the depth and will be a force to be reckoned with when paddy and trengove return. yes i know some of you think we are a better team without ryder but i say nope. it is just going to take time and they will need to sort out the forward line and to be very clear about what their role is. OMG you would think i was some kind of footy expert, ba ha ha ha ha.
     so lady army it is up to all of you tonight to secure our position. your commandress will be late due to unforseen circumstances. i have organized for lovie and the kids to be at the gates as soon as they open so some of you are being called upon your duty to help her out as i think saving 12 seats might just be  bit too much of a stretch. great weather, clear skies but cold it will no doubt be. rug up tonight lady army and fellow supporters and remember to bring the noise...as well as your thermos and sheep skin lined guchas, hee,hee. onwards and upwards captain inspiration...#team effort, #6and5, # the lady army loves youse all, # over and out!!!
love FFFandF XXX 
    

let us not leave kane in pain...and other things i should have written...

oopsies gee just like the losing streak of the power i seem to have gone missing in action myself. but guess what viewers? i am back. back after that ugly win by richmond. pooh, pooh, crap, crappy crapola...seriously i detest those who espouse winning ugly is acceptable for the game....that is complete rubbish! man i felt like i was at auskick or at a rugby match.  doesn't make for good footy at all, difficult to watch and a plan based on fear as far as i am concerned. come on don't be afraid to unleash the footy beasts. take a leaf out of ross lyon and phil walsh's book and let us see the natural game.  (more on that later). sometimes i even think they should bring in thirds like netball; no forwards or defence in the opposing teams scoring third. what do you think? does it have to come to that? better still out there is lurking some football genius, a strategist who will solve this dilemma in a creative way. ( ps make sure you come to port, thanks)

      signs were breaking the surface during the richmond clash fellow fans but shitty goal kicking let us down; nothing like a few goals in a row to get some momentum going. have to admit i commandress of the lady army even resorted to hurling croatian insults at maric. ( don't be alarmed, nothing obscene, otherwise lovie would have had me by the ear and outta the oval in a flash, hee,hee). but sadly not the send off kane cornes deserved. on the other hand one game doe not make a 300 game career. good luck champ and thank goodness you have joined the fire service because... some of the ones i saw recently at a friends wedding didn't look as though they could get a cat down from a tree, hee,hee. 

     fast forward and the melbourne game has come and gone. seriously folks i reckon i have lost a few kilos from my recently acquired footy watching habit. it's called pacing. it's called not being able to keep still. and the benefits are you get to burn off a lot more kilojoules without even having to try very hard, hee,hee. yes indeed instead of sitting down and enjoying a cold beer and a homemade pie while watching your team cruise on comfortably, you get to frantically pace up and down instead. you also get the bonus of employing the distraction strategy which is rather handy if you have a lot of household jobs that need to be done. i for one get my laundry done, the boys lunches made for school if it's a sunday. my bed is made, the vacuuming and throw in some dusting for good measure. but honestly were you on the verge of a complete freak out watching that first quarter? were you sitting there thinking oh my friggin footballs this is unbelievable. were you about to unleash the scream of NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...PLEASE STOP POWER I JUST CAN'T TAKE ANOTHER WEEK OF WATCHING YOUR GAME PLAN GO TO CRAP!!! WHAT THE FOOTY???

     and you know what? i was waiting for it. i was waiting for the fan in pain hotline to go into overload and for my phone to explode and set my house on fire but for some reason either by the simple act of faith or turning off the TV in disgust or fear of even watching the game, my phone remained silent but the voices in my sisters household did not. once the switch was flicked so were we. high fives, jumping for joy and my new catch cry with accompanying actions... choo, choo the power express is coming through echoed through the walls of a house in welland. thanks cynthia and son for joining us in the celebrations! and thankyou POWER for finally getting into gear and showing us what you are capable of. great comeback, convincing victory and a confidence booster. personally i think a lot had to do with restructuring the forward line...too many talls spoil the mark but a few new faces willing to work hard will raise the work rate. so now my beloved team you need to back it up with a few wins in a row. first one to attend to is the doggies. it is time to show them who is top dog, time to assert yourself back into the hierachy. looking forward to a far more free flowing game and a newly confident port ready and willing to build upon a much needed victory from last week. and the good news is...the lady army is bringing in the reinforcments. the bad news, krakouer has gone back to the SANFL. here's hoping to his speedy return and an elevation after round 12. and yes footy gods a win for us considering i risked myself going into enemy territory last week because a mama has to do what a mama has to do. ( i took son number two to watch freo play crows...and what a game it was)

     so enjoy this round viewers and take my advice do not get ahead of yourself like the foolish crows supporter ( an older woman) from last week at half time. yes indeed so much so that she took it upon heself to abuse my sweet boy at half time while he was waiting for me to come out of the ladies.  i returned to find him in tears but reassured him he would get the last laugh. and so the footy gods soon saw fit to swing the football freo's way and in the end i had one happy little boy who went from tears to a smile upon his face. and as my sister said she should consider herself lucky that she was not found by me. legend has it i have the voice to burst a thousand crows fans eardrums, ba ha ha ha ha, seriously that could almost be true. so until next time, keep passionate but don't stoop to the lowest to abuse children at a game folks. just remember if you get caught you will face the lady army tribunal and trust me you don't want to be facing the wrath of the feralinas!!!

love, laughter and footy passion,

FFFandF XXX

PS thankyou to those crows supporters who contacted me via twitter to make sure son number two was ok. he is and said...mum there are bad supporters in every club. and that much is true folks. come on freo declaw those cats!!! hee,hee,hee.