finals fever is here and i barely have a temperature...

oh to think last year i was in line at ticketek getting tickets for the elimination final and we had our picture snapped for the crowtiser, oops i mean the advertiser. and last year watching the boys train i was interviewed by the news and they used my voice as the voice over, (well not meaning to brag, hee, hee but one of my good friends has always said i should be on radio...mm triplem female footy commentator, i'll take that or perhaps the footy oprah of the tv world, lol). and last time this year as the semifinal approached i watched the mighty power come back in a magnificent second half to extinguish the dockers hope of a repeat appearance at the G. and listen to son number two have a complete meltdown as wingard kicked another miracle goal...(HOW CAN HE DO THAT? he screamed in pain. WINGARD WINGARD I HATE YOU!!! he yelled) and moi? i temporarily forgot i was a mother and replied...because he can and we are the MIGHTY POWER!!! and yes some of you may think that is terrible but when footy is your religion there is room to be forgiven for one's sins. (perhaps i am being punished now...WAH!) and last  year  when it came prelim time we were driving over  making our way to the victorian headquarters of the lady army to watch the second best final of the series, (the first being port and freo) which ended in heartache but still full of optimism for the future season.

      and ken hinkley says he is worried about the supporters, that's who he worries about. well ken let me tell ya, you will end up with one big, fat hernia if you are going to do that. a season that promised so much but delivered too little, a season that saw many supporters verging on the cusp of diabetes, who spent weeks comfort eating and making the stocks of four and twenty pies skyrocket to an all time high! ken take my advice and concentrate on season 2016 instead, the last thing we need is for you to be admitted to emergency with a hernia the size of two sherrins put together. yes ken, focus on next year and don't leave it too late to be ruthless, OK? make it the new mantra and bring in some fancy hypnotists to lock that in for 2016 coz the way i see it without a full strength side and coming from behind we were pipped at the post, too little, too late, WAH WAH WAH WAH! now i hope all the players are watching the finals and feeling sick in the guts, so sick it burns a hole in their jocks...the end.

     well viewers what did you think of the first lot of finals? it pains me to admit it but the crows and doggies was the best match with tigers and roos not far behind. even though the stats favoured the doggies and i still thought they would over run them, their kicking cost them the game. when the final siren sounds stats are irrelevent, look at the scoreboard folks, that is where the game is won. the eagles were supreme predators even without priddis and masten, they swoopped down upon the hawks and clipped their wings. they are certainly looking ominous folks and almost impossible to beat at home but stranger things have happened. i suspect the hawks will rebound quickly, one would assume being hardened finals campaigners they will be up for the challenge. and sorry to say it freo buddies but the dockers are the most vulnerable out of the two and one may think the easier team to beat. i know who i would rather be playing but for son number two's sake i hope i am proved wrong.

     i watched the dockers with son number two just in case my footy counselling was needed. it began fairly optimistically and looked as though freo may cinch a comfortable victory. but sydney refused to go away and again their kicking lost them the game. unless the dockers can regain their first half of the season form  i am not sure they are going to see another GF appearance at the G. will ross lyon forever remain the bridesmaid and not the footy bride? in the next few weeks we will find out. and OMFF ( oh my friggin footballs) what about the roos and the tigers?  i predicted the tigers would lose. the curse lives on to yet again rip out the heart of their supporters. did you hear dimma  at the press conference say fucking moron? OMG how many are going to lose their minds over that? personally i coin that as robbo would say, raw emotion. ( thanks for that one, robbo) hardwick must be wondering what on earth he has to do to get his team over the line. would have, should have and yes perhaps if the umpire had called holding the ball it would have resulted in a tiger's goal. but we will never know will we? strike three and they are out again, what a waste of a season. perhaps the afl neesds to introduce a new rule like in cricket where someone else runs for you while you bat. the tigers can maintain their finals position but get another team to play for them instead, ooh harsh? sorry tigers fans until you crack the finals you will be relegated to the chokers box.

     and so to end folks as much as i love football i am barely running a temperature now and i wonder if i am being punished for my evil footy thoughts and wishes? one team i loathe down (sucked in) but the one i wanted to fall, got away. perhaps this time i shall seal my lips and pray for world peace instead so that footy karma doesn't come back to bite me on the bum. oh well onward and upward to 2016 and yes, i will still be watching the finals. can we at least have some decent contests in the vain of the elimination finals which were by far the best games to watch...the end!

FFandF XXX 

the lady army plus others last stand...hip hip hooray, wah wah wah!!!

well the last game finally arrived smack bang on lovies birthday. have to say i am a little disappointed. my fine penmanship  did not even receive a response from the CEO regarding my special birthday surprsie request. hey i thought i started off rather well...

dear keith

 i am writing in regard to the compensation i believe i deserve and am entitled to as a port adelaide member and supporter. this season has been bad for my health. i have lost count of the number of chocolate bars i have consumed to allevaite my disappointment and stress, it has probably skyrocketed into the hundreds of kilos!!! a season that promised so much but that delivered too little- so now that i have your attention i would like to put in a heartfelt request, hee, hee...

      and i thought that funny got you noticed, perhaps i should have written to ken instead considering he was most worried about the supporters. god knows how many of us are verging on the cusp of diabetes! pft i won't take it too personally, at least i tried. and what on earth was i requesting for lovie? a date with russell ebert? a velevet chaise lounge upholsterd in teal? borrowing the 2004 premiership cup so she could make some punch in it for her birthday lunch? nope viewers i was just hoping that perhaps she might have been granted access to the changerooms before the game to have a few snaps taken with her fave players. for goodness sakes she is 73 it's not like she is going to distract them with her beauty (although in her heyday she would have distracted every friggin male in sight...seriously she was a natural!). no perhaps her cooking but then again i wouldn't want her arrested by the diet police!

     so even though my plan did not come to fruition it did not damper our enthusiasm for the game. not quite at full strength we had exemptions for illness but to top it all off we also had our esteemed lord howe member join us (incidentally i also put in a joint request for her and lovie to go down into the changerooms) but she almost didn't make it. it looked as though we were going to have to put in a search and rescue request but fortunately the airlines came through and delivered her to the lady army... even if she was a little late. i have to admit viewers and i have now gotten over the shame of it but my two sons came along with their dad as guess what? yep...freo supporters. well one dedicated one and a fly by night one when it suits him, so i had to contend with them but as commandress of the lady army they were relegated out of sight. ( seriously my mum hates my exes guts and i couldn't simply ruin her birthday, hee,hee) i had also prepared son number two earlier for the fact that freo were going to get rolled. it seemed to have been a forgone conclusion considering the B side arrived in its place.

      so first quarter, ho hum bit slow to get started until their gears kicked in, most likely after a bollocking from ken and from then on it was port, port, port. schulzy was awesome kicking four but somehow it felt like perhaps it was his last game, which many of us will hope is not the case. yep great to be victorious but in the end it made no difference to finals aspirations. at least they did not throw in the towel and finished off the season strongly but questions remain...will schulzy stay or go? will butcher finally get the chopping block? no disrespect i know he tries hard and does some great stuff on the ground but i do know who i would rather have shooting for goal in the dying seconds of the game. however it already looks as though they have wielded the knife and change is taking place, ( some call it being ruthless) pity they did not use it earlier, on some of our key players to get them back into form. josh carr gone to coach north, tyson edwards gone, where to i couldn't tell you. rumours of chad cornes returning to coach the magpies and nathan bassett to get a seat in the coaches box. #theywillnotfryindubai ( thanks little sista for that one) and big charlie dixon coming, perhaps they can throw in harley bennell while they are at it. mm, time will tell but i suspect there is going to be a lot of clearing out and a few traded if any club is willing to rehome some of our talent who have not had much of an opportunity to break into the senior side.

     so i am afraid viewers it is time for me to put my port polar fleece blanket away. the finals are on our doorstep and i have a few prayers that i wouldn't mind being answered by the footy gods, hee,hee...i wonder what they could be? so if you have a second team or another one you wouldn't mind winning the GF well then goodluck to you. my heart says freo but my mind says no...hawthorn for a third is my prediction and then next year we will halt their tilt at a fourth...if only footy dreams could come true. 

love FFandF XXX
ps ken was right we got what we deserved, harsh but true
pps if only, if only...WAH WAH WAH!!!
pps watch out lady army we are headed for some changes too, stay tuned for 2016

season extinguished...time to regenerate for 2016

well we certainly did extinguish the suns flames on the weekend but thanks to the roos our season was officially extinguished the week before. any slim chance gone, makes me wonder if the dockers were really trying that hard, one cannot help think strategy but of course sometimes that can backfire, we shall wait and see. let us just smash them this week instead and lament the fact that we are ninth which will refuel our resurgence next season.
     well the season certainly held some surprsies this year. didn't see the emergence of the bulldogs nor the rise of the eagles. up until last week the eagles looked completely majestic and a genuine premiership chance. when you have the wins in the bank and a second chance then you may be able to afford a blimp on the footy success radar. as much as i hate to admit it the crows were phenomenal in the first quarter, just blew them out of the oval. god it just makes me feel sick, hee,hee...how much more are we going to be subjected to? it was only a few weeks ago that roo was rolling out the excuses, yes as i quite rightly recall they were 2-3 years away according to his predictions. well now you may as well hand them the cup if you believe the hype so fickle is the football world and the experts who inhabit it. but beware i say, get too far ahead of oneself and you are heading for a spectacular fall. and the higher they place you on the pedestal the harder you fall and the more it is gonna hurt. ouch!!!! i do have my secret football fantasy but i shall keep that a secret. i don't want to be tempting footy karma just yet but i will reveal that my prediction is...no big surprises, hawks for a third flag.
     come finals time viewers and it will be a completely different ball game. having finals experience in your footy socks counts for a lot. playing in front of your home crowd is a huge bonus, just ask us who were there last year for the richmond flogging; pity i am gonna have to watch it from the sidelines, boo hoo. the best i can hope for now is that freo make it to the grandfinal for son number two's sake and that they actually win it. if not i will take the edge on your seat experience anyday after that dismal display from sydney lasty year. 
     so this week will be the lady army's last stand. it also happens to be lovies birthday...laundry threats have not allowed me to publish her age. sorry folks i admit my shame and am not willing to give up my golden laundry ticket just yet. if all goes according to plan then perhaps there will be a nice surprise for her. in anycase there will certainly be birthday cake so come down to bay 100 and stop me from ingesting my weekly allowance of fat grams and sugar in one slice! and to the footy gods if anyone truly deserves a win on her birthday it is our legendary lovie, make the margin her age and then we're talking. so onto the last game for the power folks and onto supporting the magpies in their pursuit of a sanfl premiership. some of us feralinas made it to alberton and back to grassroots footy which is where it all began. and who knows maybe the finals will still deliver a few surprises yet...just make it the ones i want footy gods, hee,hee.
love FFandF XXX

Lovie with the lady army...